I often wondered what made us become attracted to some people and not to others. Is it something within our DNA, or is it that stars align themselves in such a way, that we can’t deny our feelings? These are the questions that I asked myself, and yet, hadn’t been able to find the answers, that is, until now. The biology behind what brings about attraction for some and not others can be as simple as where we live and having a sense of humor. If we think about the many celebrities who have fallen for a co-star, it’s easy to see how attraction can flourish. Having repeated exposure increases the likelihood that we will become attracted to them. Being in proximity to someone is the most powerful indicator of attraction. We are drawn to people we see frequently.

Other factors such as our environment teaches us who we think is attractive. This goes beyond just physical features, but rather the people who are or have been in our lives plays a role in attraction. Personality traits such as kindness also influences who we might like, but it is also possible that the thinking that opposites really don’t attract truly does exist. Think about how many times we have heard the saying that opposites attract. It couldn’t be further from the truth. The more we have in common with a person, the more likely we are in taking that chance in getting to know someone. Having common interests is a factor for attraction, and without them, some relationships are able to withstand the time for only so long.

The majority of people believe that the idea that opposites attract. However, what really causes attraction is when two people are similar to each other.  This is known as the “phantom stranger technique.” The greater the similarities, the more likely we are to find an attraction for someone. It’s what is meant to be when thinking about what causes some people to be interested in some and not others. Since most people have an idea what they are looking for in someone, but we are likely to be unaware of how common qualities bring someone to seek another person out. It is our past experiences, where we live, and our biology all bring attention to what attracts us most about a person.