As we’re getting older, I find that people are changing. Not so much in their age, but rather in the area of giving. Perhaps it’s because we are all raised differently. We come with a set of different ideas and experiences. One example is being able to give and to receive gifts no matter what type of relationship that you have with a person.

What may be a simple expression of appreciation and gratitude toward person, either a friendship or to a special someone, people can become uncomfortable with gifts. It can leave relationships to feel strained or even push a person away. Giving a person a gift may be seen as a way to enhance a relationship between two people. Think about how you feel when someone buys you a coffee mug or even a lottery ticket as a way of saying “thank you” or a way of saying “I appreciate you for just being you.” Gifts may seem extravagant depending on the person and the relationship, but what if that person isn’t great with communicating their feelings. What if that gift was their only way of communicating their feelings and their most comfortable way of speaking? Often, we don’t realize that gifts can be equal to spoken words.

Not everyone is able to effectively communicate their feelings. Perhaps a simple “thank you” or “I like you” would seem easy. Unfortunately, that’s not always the case. The world has become accustomed and even at ease with being around others who think primarily of themselves. It shouldn’t come to this way of living. A simple “thank you” is an expression of gratitude, but for some, the extra expression of giving a gift card can bring about the added appreciation that can’t be spoken. Our relationships are often times categorized or put into compartments. We purposely put people into roles and what each person will people in our lives, friends or more than just friends. Giving a gift according to which role you are in tends to affect the way a person will feel about you. It can make or break a relationship. It shouldn’t have to be this way. We should be free to be who we are and to stay true to ourselves, without the fear of being seen as “buying” the person’s love. Giving a gift either through your words, a physical gift, or both feels really good to know that you can give to someone and make their day just that much brighter is what we need in our relationships. We are meant to be in this world together and for many of us we are taught about giving gifts. Not just during the holidays, but in everyday life.