Staying in a Relationship


I often wonder what happens when you find someone that you really like, but the relationship ends or worse, it’s not even given a chance to start. Where do those feelings go? Do we hide them away for the next person? Or do we pretend that our feelings no longer exist? I like to call that the ‘survival mode,’ where we push ourselves to get over a person. The truth is that at times relationships of any kind can hurt, but what about the people who stay in relationships that isn’t good for them?

I find myself hearing about relationships where people try over and over to make it work. They return to the same person more than once. Good people who stay or return to old relationships for fear of being single or not finding someone else. They feel that they are too old to start over or feel that even the lifestyle that they had this person is worth staying in. Staying in a relationship for the diamonds and pearls is a difficult reason to stay together. Relationships should be emotionally fulfilling. I believe that being on your own can lead to finding the happiness that one is looking for in life. It becomes a road to either finding someone that compliments you and vice versa, or you find fulfillment in the things in life.

Other reasons that I still people stay in relationships may be due to co-dependency or staying together for the children. Although it’s honorable to keep the relationship together for your children, however the fact is, children can sense a parent’s happiness. Today, many young people are living in an era of one-parent homes. It’s not easy to try and do it all by yourself. With the right support systems, a child is able to grow up just as happy as a child with two parents at home.

No one person can create another person’s happiness. That comes from within. It’s important to not compromise your own self-worth. If you find that you are working harder on your relationship than you are at your job, it may be time to try self-reflection. Have the courage and confidence to walk away. Always keep in mind that leaving an unhealthy relationship is going to be less painful than staying in one for a lifetime.

Our minds can get filled with television and movies. It can become easy to fall into the idea of what screenwriters and authors have created for us. At the same time, remember, if you’re unhappy in your relationship, it may be because you choose to remain unhappy. It’s because you choose to wipe your tears secretly and brush your misery under the carpet. You need to understand that you’re not a failure just because your relationship is ending or going nowhere. It just means both of you haven’t been able to understand each other, or are incompatible with each other. Settling in an unhappy relationship may seem like the easy thing to do. This includes going back to the same person, but unless you fix it or decide to walk out soon, you may find yourself living in regret. Rather than living in yesterday, find a reason to live for tomorrow.

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