We start a new year with a lot of hope for fresh starts and needed changes. It could be anything, a new job, a new home, even the chance to find happiness with that one crush that you have had for a long time. A new year is supposed to be the chance for positives to happen. Often times it does, but what I’ve found to be hardest is seeing a picture of your crush with someone else. Let’s face it the image alone stings the heart, the picture of your crush at a New Year’s Eve dinner with party hats and funny glasses. What’s left is a sure mounting feeling of being heartbroken.
I have found throughout this journey, that there are a number of people who just don’t understand the feelings behind a crush. My favorite line is the ones where your friends, family, maybe even acquaintances with say such harsh words as: “you’ll find another crush and start dating that person and then it won’t matter because you won’t care.” But rarely does that actually happen. In the back of our minds we believe that may be the case. However the truth is we never really get over that one person.
In the big world of dating and relationships, it takes seconds to feel an overwhelming sense of attraction for a person if you really let yourself. I do feel that your heart does know your likes. It doesn’t judge but people’s career or money. For example, a good friend of mine has had the same overwhelming feeling for a person. The problem is that he doesn’t have an ‘average’ job. His career is much more public than the usual and because of the amount of attention that he gets. She has no idea how to tell him the truth. Year after year, she holds out without saying a word, mostly because she wouldn’t want to put him in an awkward situation or to place him in any type of public scrutiny. A lost cause you might think to yourself, but the fact is the feelings are very real. Fact is there is no position that one person holds in the spotlight that should deny another person to express their feelings for them if it is meant with value and dignity for the other. The thinking is that she’s not looking to get into a relationship with the person for its own happiness, but to bring happiness to the other person.
It’s heart-wrenching to see every day her hope that he doesn’t find someone else. All that she is really looking for is a chance, nothing more. The heart doesn’t work off of his public position. It instead works off of feelings. We on the other hand try to change those feelings in hopes of not getting hurt. The fear that we will get hurt and instead we hold back, a lot like my friend has been doing for the past two years. We hold on to the unknown and try to figure out a way to let those feelings out in a positive and healthy way. I can feel for her because no one should go through life feeling sad. Yet does she rely on social media or professional appointments to fill the void. I don’t believe that he has any idea of her feelings. This year she made a decision, that no matter what, she will move forward in telling him the truth. No matter what happens, it’s what’s meant to be.
We need remember to follow our hearts as much as possible. As long as it doesn’t hurt others, that’s a resolution that we can all live by to find happiness. Don’t let that love get away.